The problem you face is the fact that most of the ideas you have come up with to protect yourself are incorrect. They were birthed out of pain, failure, and bad behavior. They grew out of a situation that wasn’t right, just, fair, or healthy. It isn’t an experience you want to repeat; and yet, it is one your heart has made you be ready to combat should it ever happen again.

Whether you are getting ready to go out and look for that “right” person or you have decided to never trust anyone ever again, you are over reacting to the whole situation. It is important for you to realize you are over reacting because, you don’t want to have to learn the hard way where your “new” mistakes are.

Learning by the trial and error method isn’t a good way to live your life. Using it will only expose you to new ways, you never thought of, for getting hurt. God has a perfect way for you to be healed from the effects of divorce and move into a wonderful life that is better than you have ever imagined. He has Bible principles that will heal you from your past and set you on a path with A LOT less mistakes.

God has a system that will work every time. As you might imagine, if a person applies His principles before they pick a person to date, while dating, all during the courtship period, and all during the marriage, they will have a much better life.

Most of us didn’t go God’s way. You need God’s system to teach you how to get healed from picking the wrong people to date, dating the wrong way, using bad procedures during courtship, and mishandling the marriage. Whether you and Jesus think that is the way for you to go in your future, let Him teach you how it should have been done. Plus, God’s system also works to heal people who have had a failure in a marriage that ended up in divorce like you did. It just takes you being willing to let Him show you what you did wrong.

It is going to take more time and effort; but, God has the power to heal you who applied inadequate principles to dating, courtship, marriage, and divorce proceedings.

Of course it is always better to use God’s principles when you date, during your courtship, and during your marriage. This would keep you from getting into trouble in the first place. But now that you are where you are, you need to follow God’s good divorce procedures. You need to believe that God will forgive you and heal you from EVERY mistake, problem, and hurt you have experienced. If you will accept God’s forgiveness, that will heal you from looking back at what could have been. Regret caused by learning all these wonderful principles is NOT what God wants for you. Phil 3:13-14 (NIV) Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

God’s way of life still works great for those who seem to have waited too long to get help in any area of relationship. Jesus will use this study to help you every step of the way.

• He will first deal with the problems you bring into a relationship that will sabotage it, even though it has great potential.


• He will help you pick those right people that will best join you in a healthy and meaningful relationship.


• He will guide you in how to establish patterns in relationships that will start them, keep them on track, and bring them to maturity in a wonderful way.

Whether you ever try again to find a marriage partner or just want to have friends, that is between you and God. But, the important thing is, let Jesus heal you heart so you can learn how to find people you can trust.